We are often shown how to communicate with people in an office or how to get children to behave properly. What is not always taught is how to be in a relationship. It is not an easy thing to discuss with family and friends. It is worth learning how to develop effective communication skills for couples.
The first thing is how people communicate. A lot of the time this develops from the family. Some families are very lively and discussion is actively encouraged. Other families are a bit more introspective and discussion is either considered not necessary or rude. Neither of these approaches are necessarily right or wrong and most people are usually somewhere in the middle of these two extremes.
A lot of the time this can be traced back to family interaction. Some families are very lively and debate is encouraged. Other families may be a bit quieter and may not be as verbal when it comes to communicating with each other. Neither of these approaches is necessarily right or wrong.
Where this becomes a problem is when one person from a verbose family that encourages debate meets someone who is not used to this. It can mean that what one person sees as amusing and playful banter may be perceived as name calling and mockery. If this is not addressed early on then resentments may accidentally develop.
You also need to avoid pinning blame on the partner. While they may indeed antagonize you and you may have valid points you also need to recognize other people can have an opinion on you as well. Do not solely look at how your partner can change. The chances are there are things you can do to improve the situation as well. Obviously there are exceptions. Nobody should have to put up with an abusive relationship.
However this is an extreme circumstance. A lot of the time it is more about finding a common solution. This should not be confused with compromise which often results in neither half of a couple getting what they want. Finding common goals and solutions is better in the long term and this is something you should always strive for.
It is also fair to say that this is not something that can happen instantly. Developing a way of communicating with each other in a healthy way takes time and a patient approach. It is not always easy but over time it can begin to become easier to overcome obstacles and address issues in a calm and rational way. You will never fully get rid of stress and no expert should promise the ability to always agree. However arguments will be resolved a bit quicker and in a healthier way and ultimately lead to a more positive long term relationship.
In short developing effective communication skills for couples is something that can take time. It may or may not require professional help. Whatever happens you need to always be willing to work at it and in the long term you will benefit from the rewards of learning how to effectively communicate with each other. Look online for more information and to help find support in your local area.
The first thing is how people communicate. A lot of the time this develops from the family. Some families are very lively and discussion is actively encouraged. Other families are a bit more introspective and discussion is either considered not necessary or rude. Neither of these approaches are necessarily right or wrong and most people are usually somewhere in the middle of these two extremes.
A lot of the time this can be traced back to family interaction. Some families are very lively and debate is encouraged. Other families may be a bit quieter and may not be as verbal when it comes to communicating with each other. Neither of these approaches is necessarily right or wrong.
Where this becomes a problem is when one person from a verbose family that encourages debate meets someone who is not used to this. It can mean that what one person sees as amusing and playful banter may be perceived as name calling and mockery. If this is not addressed early on then resentments may accidentally develop.
You also need to avoid pinning blame on the partner. While they may indeed antagonize you and you may have valid points you also need to recognize other people can have an opinion on you as well. Do not solely look at how your partner can change. The chances are there are things you can do to improve the situation as well. Obviously there are exceptions. Nobody should have to put up with an abusive relationship.
However this is an extreme circumstance. A lot of the time it is more about finding a common solution. This should not be confused with compromise which often results in neither half of a couple getting what they want. Finding common goals and solutions is better in the long term and this is something you should always strive for.
It is also fair to say that this is not something that can happen instantly. Developing a way of communicating with each other in a healthy way takes time and a patient approach. It is not always easy but over time it can begin to become easier to overcome obstacles and address issues in a calm and rational way. You will never fully get rid of stress and no expert should promise the ability to always agree. However arguments will be resolved a bit quicker and in a healthier way and ultimately lead to a more positive long term relationship.
In short developing effective communication skills for couples is something that can take time. It may or may not require professional help. Whatever happens you need to always be willing to work at it and in the long term you will benefit from the rewards of learning how to effectively communicate with each other. Look online for more information and to help find support in your local area.
About the Author:
If you would like to learn about effective communication skills for couples, check out this link to www.howelldynamics.net. To purchase Howell Dynamic's New Book on Couples Anger Management, visit us online at http://www.howelldynamics.net now.
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