Most average looking guys have great difficulty meeting women because they feel self-conscious and build up a lot of anxiety when they have to go over and speak to them. Attractiveness is a self-fulfilling prophecy, if you don't expect women to like you, chances are they won't!
Getting your head in the game is step one. Small talk is one way to start up a conversation with a lady you have your eye on, but don't blow it by trying to initiate a conversation by talking about stupid things like spots or the weather! Star small, ask her name, give her a compliment or ask if she has ever been here before. These are easy topics which you can expand on. Don't ask dead end questions like if she has a boyfriend or if she is here alone. She can (and probably will) shut you down before you can expel your next breath. But that's okay too. You are here to learn and it's good practice, so go out there and just try. It's the best way to get over any anxiety you may have when talking to the opposite sex.
Why do you automatically presume that she is better than you, or even a nice person at all? Go over there and just be curious to find out more about the person you have in front of you. Don't base your self-esteem on the reaction women have to you in clubs, they don't know you at all! When an interaction happens, it could be that you will not get the response you were hoping for, but maybe you have learned something new about yourself, about women or about male-female interaction on the whole.
Keep your focus on staying calm or she will smell your fear a mile away. Once she gets a whiff of your fear, sorry man, but it's over before it's even started. Be cool when you approach her and she will open up to you and probably talk your ear off. Keeping your anxiety in check will earn you more phone numbers than trying to fool her with obvious fake bravado.
What you should do is work on eliciting an emotional connection with that woman. Forget about asking her boring questions about where she works or where she lives and just try to steer the conversation in a direction that will get her to speak about some event where she felt strong emotions. If you can connect with at that level you can quite safely ask her to give you her phone number because she will be willing to give you a chance.
Once you have her number, you more than likely are assured of at least one date, maybe two. Score one for the average looking dude! Seriously though, that's a step in the right direction and directly into a few more dates with a few more ladies. It's awesome practice, so keep at it. Now then once you have her number, what the hell are you supposed to do now? Call? If so, when? Text her? All or none of the above? Good question. There is no right or wrong answer, because every woman is different. Start with a call a couple days later and set up a date. Once you have accomplished that, start texting her. Be nice and keep it clean or you will blow it. You need to get to know her a lot better before you start sending her what you think are sexy texts. You really should know what makes her hot before going down that road!
Another thing that women shy away from is neediness. If you appear needy you will be the opposite of the alpha male she is looking for. You are "allowed" to show vulnerability but she wants to see that you already have established control over your weaker areas. What women don't want is a puppy dog. Puppy dogs end up in the friend zone as they are incredibly sweet but just don't get your heart racing!
The last thing you want to do is flood her phone with texts every few minutes with inane stuff. It's going to piss her off. At the same time, don't answer every single one of her texts either. It gives the impression of being easily controlled. That's not a good place to be in as a man, and women see that as being weak. She doesn't want a puppet who is going to dance to her tune with every pull on the string, she wants someone she can respect. Be available; just don't be TOO available, if that makes any sense.
Last but not least, do not send "funny" messages that aren't really funny. Something that tries to be funny but isn't ends up being pathetic, a judgment you do not want to be in any way involved with!
So, basically by keeping within the guidelines to texting and interaction with the opposite sex, you should have no problem getting all the dates you can handle. Maybe even find a steady girlfriend.
Getting your head in the game is step one. Small talk is one way to start up a conversation with a lady you have your eye on, but don't blow it by trying to initiate a conversation by talking about stupid things like spots or the weather! Star small, ask her name, give her a compliment or ask if she has ever been here before. These are easy topics which you can expand on. Don't ask dead end questions like if she has a boyfriend or if she is here alone. She can (and probably will) shut you down before you can expel your next breath. But that's okay too. You are here to learn and it's good practice, so go out there and just try. It's the best way to get over any anxiety you may have when talking to the opposite sex.
Why do you automatically presume that she is better than you, or even a nice person at all? Go over there and just be curious to find out more about the person you have in front of you. Don't base your self-esteem on the reaction women have to you in clubs, they don't know you at all! When an interaction happens, it could be that you will not get the response you were hoping for, but maybe you have learned something new about yourself, about women or about male-female interaction on the whole.
Keep your focus on staying calm or she will smell your fear a mile away. Once she gets a whiff of your fear, sorry man, but it's over before it's even started. Be cool when you approach her and she will open up to you and probably talk your ear off. Keeping your anxiety in check will earn you more phone numbers than trying to fool her with obvious fake bravado.
What you should do is work on eliciting an emotional connection with that woman. Forget about asking her boring questions about where she works or where she lives and just try to steer the conversation in a direction that will get her to speak about some event where she felt strong emotions. If you can connect with at that level you can quite safely ask her to give you her phone number because she will be willing to give you a chance.
Once you have her number, you more than likely are assured of at least one date, maybe two. Score one for the average looking dude! Seriously though, that's a step in the right direction and directly into a few more dates with a few more ladies. It's awesome practice, so keep at it. Now then once you have her number, what the hell are you supposed to do now? Call? If so, when? Text her? All or none of the above? Good question. There is no right or wrong answer, because every woman is different. Start with a call a couple days later and set up a date. Once you have accomplished that, start texting her. Be nice and keep it clean or you will blow it. You need to get to know her a lot better before you start sending her what you think are sexy texts. You really should know what makes her hot before going down that road!
Another thing that women shy away from is neediness. If you appear needy you will be the opposite of the alpha male she is looking for. You are "allowed" to show vulnerability but she wants to see that you already have established control over your weaker areas. What women don't want is a puppy dog. Puppy dogs end up in the friend zone as they are incredibly sweet but just don't get your heart racing!
The last thing you want to do is flood her phone with texts every few minutes with inane stuff. It's going to piss her off. At the same time, don't answer every single one of her texts either. It gives the impression of being easily controlled. That's not a good place to be in as a man, and women see that as being weak. She doesn't want a puppet who is going to dance to her tune with every pull on the string, she wants someone she can respect. Be available; just don't be TOO available, if that makes any sense.
Last but not least, do not send "funny" messages that aren't really funny. Something that tries to be funny but isn't ends up being pathetic, a judgment you do not want to be in any way involved with!
So, basically by keeping within the guidelines to texting and interaction with the opposite sex, you should have no problem getting all the dates you can handle. Maybe even find a steady girlfriend.
About the Author:
Our company is an absolutely 3rd party and independent professional review online site that has actually researched the positives and negatives of text messages for dating. For our assessment on the Magnetic Messaging book concerned our web-site; Magnetic Messaging Reviewer
No comments:
Post a Comment